Halifax Harbor in the Fog

June 29, 2009
Halifax, Nova Scotia on a foggy June afternoon

Halifax, Nova Scotia on a foggy June afternoon


We’re RGIS and You Will Suck Again

June 29, 2009

Last week, I got an email from the RGIS corporate gods that included this tidbit of information:

On June 27, 2009 the Average Per Hour (APH) Standards will be raised in several of our accounts. More than half of our teams are already operating at levels that meet or exceed the “New” APH Standards, so raising the Standard may have little effect on you.

In other words, if you were a good little RGIS inventory counter, worked your ass off and met your aph goal -TOO FUCKING BAD! Starting June 27, it’s probably not good enough anymore.

Apparently, not enough of us sucked at meeting our aph goals; so instead thanking us for making the company even more profitable by meeting or exceeding productivity goals, we are being set up for failure again. If aph goals are a moving target, it doesn’t really matter how fast we count. We will never be fast enough. We will suck again.

Apparently, the corporate gods have realized that they need to give lip service to accuracy:

As we strive to execute at higher levels, we must never jeopardize accuracy or customerservice in the name of productivity!

“Oh, gosh, store manager, I can’t image why our inventory counters didn’t give you a good count. We told them never to jeopardize accuracy.”

I tell myself that I am lucky to still have a job. But some days, I’m not sure I really believe that.